Skip to content

diving

Circling The Drain of My 40’s & What I Have Learned

circlign the drain

 

My forties are coming to a close and the ever looming fifties are upon me.  I’ve always heard stuff like 50 is the new 40’s or 30’s are the new 20’s.  We make up fun sayings when we end a decade to make the slap of reality less painful. We come up with ways for theme birthday parties like Flirty Thirty, Naughty Forty and Filthy Fifty! So apparently we get nastier with age!

In my experience, I was more than happy to leave my thirties behind as well as my twenties. I have come into my own in my forties, and it only took me 25 years to do it. My forties have been so much about learning how life really works and becoming okay with who I am as a woman.

In my opinion my thirties were filthy in more ways than one. I was still in active addiction and most of my thirties passed me by without a thought. I just remember the days would pass into weeks and weeks in months and months into years.  Each New Year would come around and I would think “wow, another year and I am still alive”.  It was in the beginning of my 38th year that I began to have some clarity and with the help of God I was brought to a recovery house for women that changed my entire being.

Through this house, I started to discover the woman in me, and what it meant to be me without a belly full of something! But it was not until I entered my forties that I believe I really started to develop into a responsible, productive, loving, kind woman.

These are some of the things I have come to realize in the last decade:

I learned how to be a friend.

I learned how to let people go from my life that were toxic,

and the only people in my life love and respect me. (this one took awhile)

I experienced love and trust and could reciprocate it back.

I learned how to forgive and sometimes even forget.

I stopped caring if I had makeup on to go to the grocery store.

I started to love myself and all my imperfections.

Keeping a score card is never worth it – letting go wins, so much less energy.

Everyone is not going to love you and that’s okay just love.

I started to live in the solution not the problem. (this way of thinking helped me tremendously)

I began a sweet relationship with Jesus. ♥♥♥♥♥♥

I then started to understand what the meaning of the word surrender really means.

I truly love breathing compressed air and being underwater more than being on land.

I didn’t let my emotions rule me any longer

I have acceptance of others and myself.

Music is healing

It’s okay to cry

Not everyone will forgive you

I realized that I was either operating out of fear or love

I was either running too something or from something and I needed to stop and just be.

Grief does lessen with time and time does heal slowly.

I am more adventurous and bold than I thought – I moved to Mexico alone

That it is okay to agree to disagree with people and still find value in the friendship.

My friends know everything about me and love and accept me anyways.

I learned to be alone but not lonely.

Age is only a number and I try to not let it define me. I have friends of all ages and that gives me perspective.

Having said all that, I know my next decade of my life is going to be awesome;

I am going to embrace it with all its challenges and adventures and learning curves.

All I know for sure is:

The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing.

Socrates

Blessings

scubagirl65

 

bullshark

 

I love to SCUBA dive and ever since I can remember I have loved sharks. And the more I dive and see what is happening to our oceans, the more I love the sharks!

The picture was taken by CJ my friend at Cabo Pulmo BCS Mexico, a National Park that Jacque Cousteau once called “The Aquarium of the World”!
I have wanted to dive sharks for a long time but I have to tell you that when I saw them circling the boat before entering the water my heart rate jumped.
Now I am not a novice diver, I have been diving for years and years with a few certifications under my belt. My point I guess is: that as I was descending to 40Ft I forgot all the instructions that the boat captain gave us ……like get to the bottom quickly – don’t float around swimming above them. As I realized that everyone else was at the bottom and I was still “floating” around on my descent I quickly raced to the bottom!

Once I was settled at the bottom I looked to my left and a large bull shark was coming right for me! In the last second it turned away to a different direction.

Would I do it again? In a heartbeat – I love these creatures and I think they are often misunderstood and mainstream media does them no justice and creates fear. They make them into monsters with headlines like ” Shark seen in the FL keys” well duh that is where they live, in the ocean.

Be kind to our oceans folks!
Blessings
Scubagirl65

Diving with the Bull sharks in Cabo Pulmo, Mx

So much garbage!

My dive shop went out on a dive in our local area of Cabo San Lucas, Mx specifically to pickup garbage. So much garbage in the sea!
Now on most of my dives I come up with a pocket full of garbage from tons of fishing line and lures to bottles and cans.
Considering that this local dive spot is a no fish zone we came up with so much fishing line. I have seen the damage first hand on how hazardous this can be for marine life. Moray eels get tangled and then strangle themselves with it or get a hook in their mouth and they will surely die because they can not eat!
The strangest thing I have found in the ocean is a dirty diaper! WTH!! Or women products?? I just don’t understand humans – I would rather hang out with the fish!

Blessings
scubagirl65