When I was planning to move to Mexico my biggest concern was if I was going to be able to get my drugs that I came to rely on for the past 20 years. I soon found out that I could but they were expensive. I made a plan to get a 3-month supply and I would wean myself off 1 of the 3 drugs. Sounded like a plan, this would be one of my constant mistakes through out life – formulating a plan! I knew by this time in my life that left to my own devices and own thoughts I will suffer. My best thinking got me to this point!
When I landed in Mx, I stayed at a Christian rehab center. A place that believed through prayer, I would be healed from depression. When I heard about this place I certainly did not get a lot of hope. I heard of prayer curing people but in my heart, I thought God only helped some people but he certainly would not help me.
I grew up with a family that went to church every Sunday. I had serious Christian grandparents who were very strict and made me memorize scripture when I was 5 yrs. old. However, the story changes from here. I put my hand up at the thought of God or even the possibility of God at one point. Looking back now, I could easily believe in demons and monsters. Why then, was it such a stretch to believe in the light and goodness of God? I was blinded but soon I would see.
One of my biggest fears about going to this Christian rehab was that I swore like a trucker. Every second or third word would be the F bomb. I joked that I would probably walk through the gate and spontaneously burst into flames. I did not.
What I found in this rehab was freedom; from depression, bitterness; and a world that had a lot of gray in it. This no way infers that the grey was from living in British Columbia Canada where we had 300 days of grey skies.
For the first 2 weeks, I was getting myself acclimatized to the new world I was living in. Mexico was at its hottest time of year, September.
I was dealing with new food, new people and no real permanent home or job. All my worldly possessions packed in my little Ford Fit. What had I done driving 4000Km, to this?
Structured like no other rehab I had gone too and believe me I have seen a few, six to be exact. Morning time we were suppose to get up early and seek God by reading the bible and praying on God’s word. I never really did that when I was there. I would wake up just before it was devotional time. Enough time to get up and make a coffee. One thing with depression I always felt tired even on my meds; I loved my sleep and every one of my friends and family will attest to that.
I was meeting other residents that were all there for some kind of cure whether it is from alcohol, drugs or the dis-ease of life! All of us searching, for something, too alleviate the pain of living in this world.
After 3 weeks of learning the power of Jesus and HIS word, I decided that I was willing to try the power of prayer. Over the years I have always looked for a cure in some sort of pill, potion or notion why not try prayer! I was ready, willing, and open to believe that any thing was possible. I must admit that I still had doubt in my heart but so did doubting Thomas in the bible and Jesus was his teacher in the flesh until Jesus proved to Thomas that HE was indeed real and alive after HIS resurrection. This is what really happened to me. After Jesus had cured me of the depression, I finally believed HE was REAL.
I went off my meds.
Stay tuned for Part 3 – Cured!